A friend of mine has been consulting me for months now regarding her options in her love life - a platonic love life that is. She is in a constant turmoil on her love-friendly relationships with her two maybe three prospective candidates. We are at the stage of making a u-turn on the whole affairs. Meaning, she and I are planning her wedding reception first rather than giving our focus to the ways on how to catch the right guy. The first priority seems to be the songs to be sang at her wedding reception. There are six songs, I have been chosen to sing four out of that six songs. And the best and thrilling part is, I must sing all those four songs with a partner who happen to be my Facebook buddy. Well, he has no choice but to go along with such request. No option was offered to him. My dear buddy is like a sitting duck, being there accepting my request without even uttering a single word. Such a nice and well behaved boy-friend... Laugh out loud people.
Of course my dear friend has also planned on the ambience and the colour theme of her wedding reception and the venue plus the menu even the exact time when I should sing and when I should be having my nasi beriani and my sirap bandung. Oh! and she also planned that a very very nice and comfy tent must be erected complete with a sofa and a coffee table where she will be positioned with her beau sitting there watching me singing with my poor buddy and she will be nibling on her nice chocolate cookies and teh tarik. Hahaha.... How nice feeling, I can visualise how harmony and tranquil her wedding will be. Sigh.... bring in tears of happiness to me. Have I described everything here? One more thing, most important, that is the kompang. The kompang must play two songs to follow my dear friend from the beginning of her parade till she reaches the main tent with that nice fluffy comfy sofa. The parade will be at the minimum of ten minutes journey. A must this event people. The wedding is not complete and perfect without this traditional most significant musical instrument at play and display. Sigh, again. Simply going to be a wonderful wedding of the year, people. Absolutely well planned.
So, all things are planned as what it should be and must be finalised in two years time. Mobilisation has started since several weeks ago. Now, she and I are about to embark on the serious business. That is, getting and choosing the right candidate. There happen to be three potential candidates at the moment. However, the building of the relationships from mere friend to a lover status has been quite a challenge. Well, it looks like I must continue this part in my next post people. Gathering of more substantive information is crucial at the moment as I must give my dearest friend a solid end result. So, stay tuned people. Don't stray too far away.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough
Someone dedicated me a sad love song sung by Patti Smyth and Don Henley - Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough - it gave me many different volumes of emotions. Mostly sadness that I felt. And, I wondered why he gave me that song. I have been listening to it for many days now. Trying my best to understand the underlying meaning of the lyrics and how it relates to me and my being in a sentimental relationship with him. It was not an easy discovery for me. Because, I am not sure of his feelings toward me. I tried to figure out the true meaning and I even search the nets to get some professional help...sigh.
I found that the most logical and realistic meaning would be that "sometimes love isn't enough" mirror the relationship of two people where there have to be more than love for it to work out. I would say trust is equally or even more vital than love. There are other little things that a relationship need to make things work between them. All those little little things which do not cost you gold or diamonds.
Perhaps to some, having common interests and living individual lives could bring more happiness, or the timing and circumstances of a situation would bring happiness that can overcome love. I pondered upon the lyrics for hours, while listening to the song. It gave me such forlorn-ness. The lyrics, as you can see below:
Now, I don't want to lose you,
but I don't want to use you,
just to have somebody by my side.
And I don't want to hate you,
I don't want to take you,
but I don't want to be the one to cry.
And that don't really matter to anyone anymore.
But like a fool I keep losing my place
and I keep seeing you walk through that door.
But there's a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it's sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust.
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just ain't enough.
Now, I could never change you
I don't want to blame you.
Baby, you don't have to take the fall.
Yes, I may have hurt you,
but I did not desert you.
Maybe I just want to have it all.
It makes a sound like thunder
it makes me feel like rain.
And like a fool who will never see the truth,
I keep thinking somethings gonna change.
And there's no way home
when it's late at night and you're all alone.
Are there things that you wanted to say?
And do you feel me beside you in your bed,
there beside you, where I used to lay?
And there's a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it's sad when you know it's your heart they can't touch.
There's a reason why people don't stay who they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just ain't enough.
Baby, sometimes, love... it just ain't enough. Oh, Oh, Oh, No
are full of words of sadness about the feelings of two persons in love, perhaps, but something is not right between them of which we are not told about. But, to apply these lyrics to my situation, whom I suspect that he is someone who has some sort of affection towards me but is yet to express it loudly. Perhaps the feelings are mutual but one can never tell. So much in certain measures of feelings but so unsure of the gravity of it to tell the whole wide world about it. I am thinking that distance is a major factor contributing to this difficult connection. I firmly believe that this is not a puppy love situation.
Why must I pay attention to this dedication of just a song, right? That's the point, why must a man simply send just a song to a woman? There is always a reason for anything that happens in this world. There is always reason why we do some things or say something. Either directly or through a medium. A song is a medium for us to express our feelings and thoughts to the people out there. We express our being and our feelings and what we have in our mind popularly through songs in this highly technological era.
But, my guessing on the meaning of this song may not be correct in a sense that he may be telling me to let go and move on with my life. Confusion in love is the easiest thing to happen. But words alone to help ease the confusion may not work well when one deals with love. It has got to be more than words. That is why, there are many love songs that talk about more than words. You just can hear about more than words everywhere all over the world. In your world, in my world.
I still wonder, what and why he sent me the song. What is the message he is trying to tell. Whatever it is, I am already overwhelmed by sadness just by listening to the song.
I found that the most logical and realistic meaning would be that "sometimes love isn't enough" mirror the relationship of two people where there have to be more than love for it to work out. I would say trust is equally or even more vital than love. There are other little things that a relationship need to make things work between them. All those little little things which do not cost you gold or diamonds.
Perhaps to some, having common interests and living individual lives could bring more happiness, or the timing and circumstances of a situation would bring happiness that can overcome love. I pondered upon the lyrics for hours, while listening to the song. It gave me such forlorn-ness. The lyrics, as you can see below:
Now, I don't want to lose you,
but I don't want to use you,
just to have somebody by my side.
And I don't want to hate you,
I don't want to take you,
but I don't want to be the one to cry.
And that don't really matter to anyone anymore.
But like a fool I keep losing my place
and I keep seeing you walk through that door.
But there's a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it's sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust.
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just ain't enough.
Now, I could never change you
I don't want to blame you.
Baby, you don't have to take the fall.
Yes, I may have hurt you,
but I did not desert you.
Maybe I just want to have it all.
It makes a sound like thunder
it makes me feel like rain.
And like a fool who will never see the truth,
I keep thinking somethings gonna change.
And there's no way home
when it's late at night and you're all alone.
Are there things that you wanted to say?
And do you feel me beside you in your bed,
there beside you, where I used to lay?
And there's a danger in loving somebody too much,
and it's sad when you know it's your heart they can't touch.
There's a reason why people don't stay who they are.
Baby, sometimes, love just ain't enough.
Baby, sometimes, love... it just ain't enough. Oh, Oh, Oh, No
are full of words of sadness about the feelings of two persons in love, perhaps, but something is not right between them of which we are not told about. But, to apply these lyrics to my situation, whom I suspect that he is someone who has some sort of affection towards me but is yet to express it loudly. Perhaps the feelings are mutual but one can never tell. So much in certain measures of feelings but so unsure of the gravity of it to tell the whole wide world about it. I am thinking that distance is a major factor contributing to this difficult connection. I firmly believe that this is not a puppy love situation.
Why must I pay attention to this dedication of just a song, right? That's the point, why must a man simply send just a song to a woman? There is always a reason for anything that happens in this world. There is always reason why we do some things or say something. Either directly or through a medium. A song is a medium for us to express our feelings and thoughts to the people out there. We express our being and our feelings and what we have in our mind popularly through songs in this highly technological era.
But, my guessing on the meaning of this song may not be correct in a sense that he may be telling me to let go and move on with my life. Confusion in love is the easiest thing to happen. But words alone to help ease the confusion may not work well when one deals with love. It has got to be more than words. That is why, there are many love songs that talk about more than words. You just can hear about more than words everywhere all over the world. In your world, in my world.
I still wonder, what and why he sent me the song. What is the message he is trying to tell. Whatever it is, I am already overwhelmed by sadness just by listening to the song.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Miracles
The worst stage in one's life will be the failure of oneself to achieve the union of one's love as the apex of success in love and in showing the world of one's precious of the heart. It has been said that to know love one must knew pain. But some say love is pain. It has been said in a popular song that the purest of pain is love indeed. How can one describe pain is love and love is pain. It intertwined and it is an indescribable pain. How could one believe this notion of pain and love as two in one. Must one posses when one loved? Must love comes with possession? But some say to love truly is to let go and if the loved one returns he belongs to you. Some even said that to be loved and to love are miracles. Something so unbelievably special to the heart and the emotion that one just could not tell it in the most right words. That one need to express that feelings through touch and senses. Words will no longer fulfill the needs of love. Is that true? I am very inclined to believe it is so.
It's All For Love
Scene 1
About three weeks ago, in the master bedroom on the bed, husband and wife busy reading serious stuff. Husband with thick important book, while the wife with the all important magazine of all time. Suddenly, the wife asked the husband a question. Honey, she said. Yes....., replied the husband. I've been thinking lately, she continued. Hmmm....., replied the husband. I'm thinking of smoking cigarette. What you think?, she asked. He said, Love, I quit smoking years ago. And, I did it just like that. I told my brain that I want to quit and I quit. Its like mental game to me dear. I wanted to test my mental strength, and there it was, a simple and easy quit. Besides, next you will be thinking of the brand, he smiled at her. And she said smiling back to him, oh well, there's no point then to start smoking. And, they continued their reading.
Scene 2
Last night. Both husband and wife sitting in the living room together and as usual both were holding the all important book and magazine as if these are the ever important factor in their life. Suddenly the wife asked the husband while flipping through her magazine. Honey....., she said. Hmmm....., replied the husband. I've been thinking you know, she continued. Yes....., he answered , still reading with intent. I'm thinking of smoking cigar, she blurted the words. He changed position and thinking to himself, this is the uttermost important chapter I'm reading now. And he replied, love, cigar is expensive. Why not try the rokok daun or chew the sireh, it' cheaper besides, it's good for cross-examination...! He looked at her with wide eyes. She looked back at him with blinking eyes, and, suddenly she laughed. A hilarious laughter. After few seconds she stopped laughing and said, I knew it that you loved me that much for you to give me such answer! And, he responded well to that laughter and, they started to talk about old times.
Why am I writing about these two scenes people? To show to you all the need to communicate freely to your loved one and to be able to relate with your partner in honesty and sincerity with whatever things that cropped-up in your mind no matter how mundane it can be. And, in so doing, you are also testing the level of patience your spouse has towards you. How well your partner gave his/her response to your mundane query, will depend on how strong your relationship with him/her that you both have built thus far. This is an important element in building a healthy relationship, people. Open and free flowing reasonable line of communication is most important. Without it, life can be miserable. Imagine living a life with someone who cannot relate and respond to you positively. It is a torture indeed. This is the first part.
The second part will be that the husband as in the above case must be quick to detect the cause for the wife to ask questions like that to him. And to ask it within short period of time. There must be something going on in her mind, right? Yes, something is definitely building inside. She may be bored with her daily routines. She may not be getting enough attention from her husband. She may need more actions from her husband. She may be revealing her secret desires to him in coded words. All these are potential reasons. Her husband just need to be more attentive and sensitive to her needs and start paying attention. If things are left without being rectified, other kinds of emotional imbalance might arise like for example, seeds of doubt about her husband's feelings and love towards her. As such is the situation, open communication must be the trait in your marriage life, all throughout the relationship.
What is it that makes two different individuals stay together in a relationship and bear with each other eccentricities? I would say, LOVE. Love is the reason for it. All kinds of hardships, sadness, troubles and tests are bearable so long there is love that glued both of them together. Love brings togetherness. Togetherness brings understanding. Understanding brings peace.
Remember people, it's all for love. Don't leave home without it!!
About three weeks ago, in the master bedroom on the bed, husband and wife busy reading serious stuff. Husband with thick important book, while the wife with the all important magazine of all time. Suddenly, the wife asked the husband a question. Honey, she said. Yes....., replied the husband. I've been thinking lately, she continued. Hmmm....., replied the husband. I'm thinking of smoking cigarette. What you think?, she asked. He said, Love, I quit smoking years ago. And, I did it just like that. I told my brain that I want to quit and I quit. Its like mental game to me dear. I wanted to test my mental strength, and there it was, a simple and easy quit. Besides, next you will be thinking of the brand, he smiled at her. And she said smiling back to him, oh well, there's no point then to start smoking. And, they continued their reading.
Scene 2
Last night. Both husband and wife sitting in the living room together and as usual both were holding the all important book and magazine as if these are the ever important factor in their life. Suddenly the wife asked the husband while flipping through her magazine. Honey....., she said. Hmmm....., replied the husband. I've been thinking you know, she continued. Yes....., he answered , still reading with intent. I'm thinking of smoking cigar, she blurted the words. He changed position and thinking to himself, this is the uttermost important chapter I'm reading now. And he replied, love, cigar is expensive. Why not try the rokok daun or chew the sireh, it' cheaper besides, it's good for cross-examination...! He looked at her with wide eyes. She looked back at him with blinking eyes, and, suddenly she laughed. A hilarious laughter. After few seconds she stopped laughing and said, I knew it that you loved me that much for you to give me such answer! And, he responded well to that laughter and, they started to talk about old times.
Why am I writing about these two scenes people? To show to you all the need to communicate freely to your loved one and to be able to relate with your partner in honesty and sincerity with whatever things that cropped-up in your mind no matter how mundane it can be. And, in so doing, you are also testing the level of patience your spouse has towards you. How well your partner gave his/her response to your mundane query, will depend on how strong your relationship with him/her that you both have built thus far. This is an important element in building a healthy relationship, people. Open and free flowing reasonable line of communication is most important. Without it, life can be miserable. Imagine living a life with someone who cannot relate and respond to you positively. It is a torture indeed. This is the first part.
The second part will be that the husband as in the above case must be quick to detect the cause for the wife to ask questions like that to him. And to ask it within short period of time. There must be something going on in her mind, right? Yes, something is definitely building inside. She may be bored with her daily routines. She may not be getting enough attention from her husband. She may need more actions from her husband. She may be revealing her secret desires to him in coded words. All these are potential reasons. Her husband just need to be more attentive and sensitive to her needs and start paying attention. If things are left without being rectified, other kinds of emotional imbalance might arise like for example, seeds of doubt about her husband's feelings and love towards her. As such is the situation, open communication must be the trait in your marriage life, all throughout the relationship.
What is it that makes two different individuals stay together in a relationship and bear with each other eccentricities? I would say, LOVE. Love is the reason for it. All kinds of hardships, sadness, troubles and tests are bearable so long there is love that glued both of them together. Love brings togetherness. Togetherness brings understanding. Understanding brings peace.
Remember people, it's all for love. Don't leave home without it!!
Friday, October 8, 2010
The Fragrant Garden
Hi people!! Its been a while now since last we met. September has left us, and, October is here to stay. Yes, autumn we welcome you. In this season one is reminded of spring and summer. How wonderful are those seasons bask with colours and sweet smells everywhere.
Almost one can sense the intoxicating sweet rare perfume, secret promises from the secret admirer.
It is like a fragrant garden fills with roses, jasmines, carmelias, honeysuckles, magnolias and vanillas, lavenders and ylang ylang, sakuras and apple blooms and orange blossoms that make one feels almost being showered with mixtures of thousand fragrances from thousand blooms... ahhh... so divine is such a place if one can languish in it even for a minute.
A fragrant garden is where we want to be. A place so beautifully graced with beautiful colours like rainbow and scented to the core from down below up to the sky, surrounded endlessly by the sweet musky scent then followed by the uninvited guests - the bees and the butterflies and the hummingbirds and the couple in love. Always the picture of the blue sky embroidered with the white fluffy clouds. There are days where rain might fall but of course, the sky will be brighten again with the sun come smiling to earth.
Such is the heart of a being at peace with himself. Such is the heart of a woman in love. Such is the picture of two persons in love with each other and at peace with themselves. Such is the heart of a knowing man of the true meaning of life. What is a life of a human being without the beauty of a fragrant garden in his heart. Why must anyone wonder what life is with all its mundane and cruel bits of events which eventually will become so meaningless for it concerns only material gain and loss. Strive for the beauty of the fragrant garden. Walk the road to the journey of your life towards the fragrant garden. The fragrant garden of your heart is the centerpiece of your meaning in this planet and your meaning in comprehending your being with the other beings. Lets not abandoned the fragrant garden. For abandoning the good of life is like killing humanity itself. It has been said that life is dead when the sun is not shining again in the garden. Alas, life is ended when love has died.
As has been said ...
A fragrant garden is where we want to be. A place so beautifully graced with beautiful colours like rainbow and scented to the core from down below up to the sky, surrounded endlessly by the sweet musky scent then followed by the uninvited guests - the bees and the butterflies and the hummingbirds and the couple in love. Always the picture of the blue sky embroidered with the white fluffy clouds. There are days where rain might fall but of course, the sky will be brighten again with the sun come smiling to earth.
Such is the heart of a being at peace with himself. Such is the heart of a woman in love. Such is the picture of two persons in love with each other and at peace with themselves. Such is the heart of a knowing man of the true meaning of life. What is a life of a human being without the beauty of a fragrant garden in his heart. Why must anyone wonder what life is with all its mundane and cruel bits of events which eventually will become so meaningless for it concerns only material gain and loss. Strive for the beauty of the fragrant garden. Walk the road to the journey of your life towards the fragrant garden. The fragrant garden of your heart is the centerpiece of your meaning in this planet and your meaning in comprehending your being with the other beings. Lets not abandoned the fragrant garden. For abandoning the good of life is like killing humanity itself. It has been said that life is dead when the sun is not shining again in the garden. Alas, life is ended when love has died.
As has been said ...
"Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. The consciousness of loving and being loved brings a warmth and richness to life that nothing else can bring. ~~ Oscar Wilde" ...
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